Category: Uncategorized
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IFS practice group this Saturday (Nov 5): Make friends with the voices in your head!
It’s been a while since I’ve hosted an official gathering, but I’ve been practicing hard, and I keep getting inquiries, so it must be about time. The exact time is this Saturday, November 5th from 3:00pm-6:00pm. And, even better, Shannon has been doing intensive (averaging multiple hours a day!) IFS training with me, so the…
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Identifying With
Recently I’ve been using the phrase “identify with” a bunch. As in, “I’m learning not to identify with my past self”, or “I try not to identify with my beliefs”, or “the ego is what, when accurately perceived, we stop identifying with”. When a friend of mine asked me what I meant by “identifying with”,…
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NVC Question #12
Question: Explain to me why “intimidated” is not a proper feeling-word. Answer: “Intimidated” isn’t an emotion—the word includes an interpretation of the situation. The emotion on its own would probably be fear, maybe anxiety, maybe some other mix. When you say “intimidated”, you’re also bringing up a story about the other person’s behavior, and I’d…
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NVC Question #11
Question: I’m still kind of confused about the NVC general sense of the term ‘need’. I’d before been thinking that NVC talks about ‘needs’ rather than ‘values’ or ‘wants’ because by thinking of them as needs, people would respect the desire once noticing and taking account of it, in themselves and/or others. So this was…
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NVC Question #10
Question: How does “I need to…” relate to NVC needs, such as judgments being alienated expressions of unmet needs? Answer: “I need to” is classified as an internal demand, which is related to a judgment, but a bit different. “Demand” means that fear, guilt, or shame are part of the enforcement system.